Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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