I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
