ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Randomize
