I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize