Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
