You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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