"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
