I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize
