Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize