yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
