ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
