Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
