Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize
