Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
