Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
