TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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