if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
