okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
