its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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