i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
