Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
