i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
