I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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