Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
