They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
