Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I'm really busy with my period
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