me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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