She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
