I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
