We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
her facebook's as public as her vagina
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
