we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
My feet surprised me
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