is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
