We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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