belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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