Need sex. Gaining weight.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize