I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
