she smelled like a LAN party
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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