I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
