if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
