i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
