your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
