Jerry, you need to find god
smell my finger.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
