Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
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