Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
