all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
