Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
