Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Randomize
