I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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