I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
