never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
